slipping through the cracks, still

okay, i am average. i've come to accept it. brown hair, brown eyes. 5 foot 4. 34b and 7.5. i'd mention my weight but i am not insane. anyways, on these levels, i am totally willing to admit that i am average. apparently, i am also forced to admit that i am utterly forgettable. what other reason is there for my chronic case of "slipping through the cracks-itis"?

i can't say when it started but i can certainly list its high points. why is it that not one single member of the Tam High faculty ever noticed that i kind of never went to class? Why is it that no authority figure (back when i needed such a thing) ever noticed my glazed over eyeballs? Why is it that I never had to do community service for the moving violation i got which declared such punishment? and my favorite: why was i attending night beauty school for 9 months when all the while they had me in an "inactive" file? sometimes, whether i am in the room or not, i am truly not there. all of you philosophy folks can get busy on that and let me know what you come up with.

have you ever bought or sold a house? it is stressful. add all of my emotional baggage And the fact that this in Neil's first dive into real estate and you have a recipe for some deluxe sleepless nights...(for me, at least). But the one thing that makes it all okay is that when you are in the midst of such madness, there are people who Are Employed only to keep you safe. One is your real estate agent (bay area people please contact Shanis Nelson at Pacific Union for all of your RE needs. She is stellar). The other is (or should be) the Title Company Person.

Here is where my chronic "itis" comes into play. Let's say you had an amount of money that needed to move from one party to the other. Let's also say that this amount is a lot. A LOT. Let's say that the person in charge of this is called the......i don't know....let me get creative...Title F-ing Company Person?
Here is a short list of exceptionally wrong things i have heard from TFCP, on the phone and in person:

• Why are you here?
• who are you?
  
• what's the property?
• i don't have the documents.
  
• I *think* I sent the wire transfer info.
  
• i can't follow up on the wire transfer because i don't have his number and i deleted his email.
• i don't know.
• i don't know.
• i don't know.

so, to summarize, i did it again. i slipped through the cracks. But this time, i did not get the benefit of a clean record by the Oakland Police or some free time to smoke cigarettes in Meade Theatre. I almost got totally f-ed. and so did Neil. maybe it's contagious? It shouldn't be. Neil is tall. He has green eyes. and he can draw. can't he carry both of us? we'll find out tomorrow at 2pm when we show up at TFCP's office to Close The Deal.

But what about our rental? won't we miss it so? i'll make a list and we'll find out.
Things I Will Miss About The Rental On Lowell:

• since nobody ever painted the trim to begin with, and the trim was coming off the walls already, it didn't really phase me when the cat puked on it. that was kinda cool.
  
• it was almost fun when we took TSP to the walls. i would say the color change was something along the lines of "chocolate to cream". smokers are gross and stinky (what?!).
• our neighbors probably had no idea that they were potentially luring their beloved squirrels to their deaths when they fed them on our common fence. maybe they have dogs that like to snuggle with squirrels. ours would rather eat them. I see how there would be confusion there.
  
• having no AC builds character. if you don't believe me, ask your grandpa. and make sure you ask him when it's over 100 degrees outside.
• neighbors with explosives!
• did you hear? neighbors with explosives!
• oh, you are deaf because of your neighbors with explosives. i understand.
  

needless to say, we are ready to move tomorrow. we are hoping that everyone has done what they should have. the funny thing is that if Anyone was supposed to F everything up, it should have been us! But all we are guilty of is being utterly forgettable. (except for the green eyes and tallness and drawing. i married that shit! it's mine! i own it! remember me?!)